Last night, my heart was at peace.
There is a group of musicians and tech gurus that get together once a month to eat dinner, study scripture, and sing worship songs. Last night was that night.
Eleven of us crowded around a table to eat a delicious homemade potluck dinner. Our host grilled a delicious pork loin, others brought salads, people brought different kinds of mac-n-cheese, we had different desserts, and tons of veggies so that we could at least pretend we were being healthy.
Usually, people disperse throughout our gathering space to eat, but for some reason, we all chose to sit at the table together. Some of us were on stools, others on dining chairs, and some even pulled up a chair from the living room. The table wasn’t big enough for all of us, but somehow we all managed to fit around that table at the same time.
As I looked around the table I saw something beautiful. There were new people around the table, and some that have been hanging out for years. There were older people and younger people. There were people who have struggled with addiction, financial struggles, relationship problems, car troubles, family problems, and even struggles at work and with friendships. Everyone around that table has experienced their fair share of struggles and disappointments. We have all cried, we have all celebrated, we have all experienced life.
After dinner, we moved into the living room, we sang worship songs, we reflected on scripture and we went home. And as I walked to my car, I was grateful for everyone that was there, and even those that couldn’t make it, because my heart knew that these people had become some of my closest friends.
This morning, as I reflected on that experience, I was reminded of a verse in the bible:
Some friends play at friendship but a true friend sticks closer than one’s nearest kin.
Proverbs 18:24
We all have family that we love and cherish. We all have family that knows us, sometimes better than we know ourselves. We all have family that is blood related and we absolutely love them. I for one, don’t know what I would do without the support of my family. And truth be told, no one could every replace my family.
But I guess my heart was at peace, because as I looked around that room, it became very obvious that the people there were not playing at friendship. Everyone in that room genuinely cares for each other and would be willing to sacrifice their own needs for each other. Something beautiful that happens when people stop playing at friendship and actually become willing to be true friends towards each other.
I saw it happen last night. And that assurance I felt in my hearts, was the assurance that that is the way friendships are supposed to be: real, authentic and not played at.
So I want to challenge you today in three ways. First, evaluate your friendships to others. Where are you “playing at friendship” with people and where are you being a true friend to people. Are there places in your life that people might think they can count on you, but when push comes to shove, you go missing? Maybe there are places in your life where you need to stop playing at friendship and instead start living out the friendship.
The second challenge regards noticing those people around you who don’t play at friendship. Do you notice the people around you who genuinely care about you and would be willing to sacrifice anything for you? If you do, maybe you can thank them for that gift. It is not always easy to find friendships like that.
And third, I want to challenge you to join our Mid City Church community. We have tons of small groups that you can join, we are always looking for more musicians, and we are actively involved in the Mid City neighborhood. I have no doubt that here, you will find people who are tired of playing at friendship. And if you too are tired of playing at friendship, then I hope you will join us!
Together on the journey, Pastor Fernie
